In A Funk...

I have been in a funk this past week! When we got the news that we would not be returning to Russia...at least not any time soon...and the reality set in that we would soon be without a job...or money, security, focus, goals and identity that all go with employment...I began planning. That is what I do...I plan. Even when I know I need to pray...I am still making plans to present to the Lord, giving him options, choices, suggestions!!!

This week several of my plans were rejected by the Lord and I felt my list of possibilities growing smaller. I know I said that I would do ANYTHING, but honestly, that was a lie. I can do anything...or at least a lot of things, but I don't really want to!

When you are unemployed, especially in today's economy, you get a job...you don't WAIT! At least that is what the World would tell you, your friends and family would tell you, I WOULD TELL YOU TO GET A JOB!!! No one would tell you to WAIT! However, I feel like the Lord is telling us to wait...does he not know that we have been waiting?!?

Today, I reached my pinnacle of frustration...mainly with myself. After scrolling the numerous job possibilities and getting more and more discouraged, I finally picked up my Bible to be told..."Those who wait upon the Lord will renew their strength!" I am waiting...and trying to find joy in it!!!

We have SOOO many things to be thankful for...a great home to borrow, a reliable car to borrow...which both mean minimal financial needs...which is a huge blessing, Gideon is making lots of progress, we are all healthy, happy and usually having a blast!!! Pray that I would find contentment, joy and security in the Lord...not in the World, things or a job!!!

"Why do you complain, Jacob? Why do you say, Israel, "My way is hidden from the LORD; my cause is disregarded by my God"? Do you not know? Have you not heard? The LORD is the everlasting God, the Creator of the ends of the earth. He will not grow tired or weary, and his understanding no one can fathom. He gives strength to the weary and increases the power of the weak. Even youths grow tired and weary, and young men stumble and fall; but those who hope in the LORD will renew their strength. They will soar on wings like eagles; they will run and not grow weary, they will walk and not be faint."
Isaiah 40:27-31